Since one of my Mongol Rally teammates, Sherry Ott, was kind enough to make a full disclosure of her road trip quirks, I felt compelled to weigh in on the issue.

For the most part, I’m an easy going traveler and can get along with anybody. I love all kinds of music, so control of the radio is not important to me.  I have a strong bladder so infrequent stops will not be a problem. I do have Attention Deficit Disorder but that just means I’m interested in everything… just not for long periods of …..oooh look a camel!!

From a relationship standpoint, the only potential hazard I see from traveling 10,000 miles across two continents in a small vehicle with three other people is …drum roll…….stomach gas. You know it’s going to happen! If it doesn’t, the Guinness people should be contacted immediately.

According to a University of Iowa study, “the average person has 1 pint to ½ gallon of intestinal gas per day. Gas is expelled from the body an average of 10 to 18 times per day.” I read that on the internet, so it must be true. What matters at this point is how we, as a Mongol Rally team, deal with it.

Years ago when my daughters were young, I took my family on a road trip to Disney World. My solution was to roll down the window and pretend to adjust the  side-view mirror whenever the gas decided to present itself. I think we were somewhere near Valdosta, Georgia when my youngest daughter said, “Dad, please stop rolling down the window. It stinks outside!”

We all do it, whether we admit it or not. Social norms cause many of us to be embarrassed when we do it, or to be offended when someone else does it. That’s not what God intended.

God could have created us not to have gas at all. Or He could have created us only to have silent, gas. But he didn’t. In his love and compassion, he created our bodies with a gas expulsion system possessing a distinctive, yet humorous, sound that acts as an early warning system alerting those within earshot to take appropriate evasive measures. That is why I believe that it is rude NOT to sound the alarm.

Therefore, my pledge to my teammates is to not engage in diversionary tactics or  to be stealthy in any gaseous emissions, causing them to wonder who the culprit was or worse yet to harbor resentment and falsely blame one another. I intend to  let it ring… just as God intended. It is my hope that my teammates will extend me the same courtesy.

That being said, we hope to land Gas-X or Beano as a sponsor.

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